Post Betrayal

Want to trust again. Me. You. Us.

Want to stop my mind going back over and over again to that moment when my heart sank.
Want to get back to the surface of love and not drown in the murky waters of jealousy, anger, bitterness and doubt.
It's been a while, but today everything reminds me that you hurt me.
A comment on the tv, the shape of clouds
the taste of a square of chocolate.

Today I don't have much faith. In me, you, us or the rest of humanity for that matter.
People (some) say:
It's all pure and simple
It's black or white
If I were you I wouldn't... If I were you I would...
Experts of all sorts, are you any happier than me?
Do you follow your own advice?

The tale of my real fairy life:
Dirty and complicated
All shades of grey
As I am me I will.. do whatever I decide to, change my mind and change my mind again.
Whether I trust you, us, again only time and I will tell.

Tomorrow I will have faith. In me, you, maybe even the rest of humanity.
Some days, everything reminds me of how much I love you still
a comment on tv, the shape of clouds
the taste of a square of chocolate.